Would You Drink It?

Why should you tune in for my upcoming series Hearts Undaunted?
Here’s a scenario:
Suppose you are not a coffee drinker. (I hear such people exist.)
Suppose you are attending a social function. A family member approaches you, raving about the coffee. He hands you a steaming mug and encourages you to try it.
You have zero desire to taste that coffee–black, creamed, sugared, or otherwise.
He insists you’ll love it. Go ahead, try it!
You know he won’t let it drop until you indulge him; yet, you don’t want to drink the coffee.

What do you do?
A wise woman proposed this scenario to me years ago. I shook my head emphatically.
“No,” I lied, knowing exactly what she expected me to say. “Of course not! I wouldn’t drink that coffee!”
In reality, I would have drunk it…because I lived trapped in a prison of fear, anxiety, worthlessness, and rejection. I was overwhelmed with life, thinking that if I behaved the way people expected me to, then they would approve of me. That would confirm both my worth as a person and the fact that I am living a good life.
Today, I will NOT drink that coffee. (As long as it’s that hypothetical kind. In reality, I love coffee, all caloried up with flavored creamer.)
If you:
*worry about how others will react to your decisions
*are afraid to set boundaries will people
*feel rejected when people disagree with you or live differently than you
*think you’re failing as a wife, mom, or friend because you’re not getting enough done
*are overwhelmed with rearing little ones
*are struggling to find your direction in life
*feel like life is one big struggle
*feel anxious about making decisions
*want to live life more fully
*often feel discouraged and don’t know how to climb out of it
*can’t stop being a people-pleaser
then my series is for you.
I am not a mental health professional. I do not seek to treat any underlying medical issues.
But I can tell you what worked for me!
Over the course of my adult life, I have been searching for ways to break free from my personal struggles, with some success–but knowing I needed something more.
In the last year, God has taken me on a journey that has included:
*facing a childhood trauma head on
*living overwhelmed and semi-depressed
*identifying major distortions in mine and others’ theological understandings
*severing a treasured friendship-turned toxic
*evaluating my relationships
*drastically paring down and evaluating ALL my commitments
*my husband losing his job
*allergy and potty training issues

He has taught me some crazy good things through these trials.
He has broken major chains.
He has blessed me wildly.

And I’d love to share His work in my life in case you facing any of these things, too.

God-willing, we will jump into it the last week of August! If you want an idea of things to come, you can peruse the following books. You don’t need to read them in order to benefit from what I’m sharing. Should you ever be looking for a good read, however, these are 
 I’d love for you to just get comfy with this series. Take your time, and soak up what you can.  My hope is for you to leave it feeling encouraged and equipped to live a full and centered life!
Do you have any thoughts for me as I put this together for you? Questions, comments, ideas? Would you drink the coffee? It is a treat to hear from you! 

Life In Bloom


  1. Coming to you via mary Beth.

    Ha! I used to be the person who would have drunk the coffee. (or perhaps refused and then slunk away in shame and never spoken to that person again).

    Boundaries by Cloud and Townend was SO revolutionary for me – I totally get where you’re coming from on this. I blog on the Bible, suffering, and the messy edges of life – I really appreciate oepthers who dig deep too. Sending you a virtual high-five!

  2. Ah, the lovely Mary Beth! Hooray for you, that you will no longer drink the coffee! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and kind words, Tonya! I’m looking forward to hopping over to your blog to check it out. Blessings to you.

    • Well that sure boosts a girl’s spirits–the lovely Mary Beth. I’ll keep it!

      I totally would not drink the coffee. Because I HATE coffee. But your story does get me thinking…
      I’m so looking forward to your series!
      Mary Beth
      Thanks for linking up!

    • Yes, lovely indeed. And it can be so very easy to give in to the expectations of others! Thanks for for your support, Mary Beth. I am enjoying your link up, too.

  3. (Arrived here via Lisa’s Whatever Wednesdays.) Great post! I would drink the coffee but for a different reason. I just don’t care. If someone were to ask me to do something that went against my beliefs, no way… but try their coffee? Okay, sure. After all, “Food will not commend us to God. We are no worse off if we do not eat, and no better off if we do. But take care that this right of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak.” (1 Corinthians 8:8-9 ESV). I can see it being a point of assertiveness for some people, but since I really don’t mind and it would give opportunity for conversation instead of shutting it down, I would just go ahead and drink. Just my two cents :)

    • Bethi, thank for visiting! You make a good point. A lot of good can happen in that conversation. It’s something to think about, isn’t it-which “battles” to engage in, what is an opportunity, and when to walk away. I appreciate your thoughts here.

  4. In the women’s Bible study I lead we did Renee Swope’s book last Spring. It was a great study!

    • So you know the treasure that book is! Renee is so wise and encouraging. I would love for you to join me for this series so I can hear your thoughts on some of Renee’s ideas and how they impacted you!

  5. Hi Mandy,
    Your book suggestions are great! Looking forward to your new series. I’m a first-born, perfectionistic people-pleaser and NOTHING is better than watching those shackles fall :)

    Linking up from Leaving A Legacy,

    • Susan, thanks for your kind words! And, amen! It is hard work, but God gives such grace to break those chains, and then there is nothing like it! I am excited to have you follow the series!

  6. SOO excited for you to do your series. I know it will be wonderful! :D

  7. Looking forward to your series! So happy for you:)

  8. Ah yes, I would have drunk the coffee, every last drop and proclaimed it was… whatever the giver wanted me to say! Having the chains broken, and walking in freedom is an amazing,wonderful thing! I can`t wait for series! Thanks for linking up with WUW!

    • Oh, Katharine! You are awesome! You put a smile on my face because I SO know what you mean! Thank you for your support. I am thrilled to share the series with you, and I can’t wait to hear your thoughts!

  9. I do not like coffee. At all. Cream, sugar, flavors – ick! All I taste is burnt flavor. So, if someone was insisting that I try it, I probably would refuse. But if their insistence continued to the point of creating a scene I might take a sip and then declare I didn’t like it just so they would leave me alone.

    But I don’t want to get caught up in your example. Because that’s not really your point. Your point is do I do what I want or know is right, or do I let an unhealthy desire to please others influence my decisions. On that count, I would say I do. But I’m working on it. :)

    • And that is what matters, isn’t it? Working on it. God know we cannot be perfect, and He graciously bestows His mercy. Here’s to working on it together!

  10. Visiting from WIP Wednesday – sounds like you are planning a really timely series. A topic that many women struggle with – so, blessings on you as you share your heart on this subject.

    • Thank you, Cherry! Yes, I think no matter how confident some woman may seem, we must know that everyone struggles with discouragement, anxiety, and expectations. I would love for you to join us for the series!

  11. Our goal should be to please God, not to please others. Thanks so much for the great post & for visiting and commenting on the Rhapsody Ballroom blog!
    Your blog is a blessing and I am now following it, and I invite you to follow my Bible study/devotional blog, Saved by Grace:
    Love in Him,
    Laurie Collett

    • Thanks, Laurie! So true: when I realized that the approval of others can be an idol, that really shifted things for me! I appreciate your kind words. I would love for you to join us in this series.

  12. So honored to be part of your series! Thank you! :)

    • So honored that you stopped by my corner of the world! Thanks, Holley! You’re Already Amazing spoke to my heart and helped to break some big, heavy chains. Thanks for being you!

  13. Mandy, this series looks great. I will look forward to reading when it begins.
    Thanks for stopping by over at my blog today :o)


  14. Thanks, Amanda! I am thrilled to have you share in it! I appreciate you popping in here and sharing your thoughts. I’m so glad you joined the Better Writer group. You are a gifted supporter and encourager. Thanks for being a blessing!

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